Weekend Writing Warriors 8 – 10/4/2020 – Untitled WIP

Hey there Weekend Writing Warriors. We are hitting the final stretch of 2020–October. Here is a little bit of trivia about me. I wish we could bypass this month. Go from September 30, straight into November 1. Other than several family members having birthdays this month, I do not like October.

As for our snippet for this week we jump back into the investigation. Grady is being briefed by Detective Carmen Albanese of her findings. They have discovered information about both the victim and their perp. We pick up where we left off.

Here is a bit from last week:

“Mr. Tattoo must have had…”

“Who?”

“Sorry, we don’t have and ID on the…”


“Stephen Allan Tanner,” Carmen said, handing him another file, this one was fairly thick. “That’s your corpse.”

SYNOPSIS:
Lieutenant Daniel Masters is a 27-year veteran Savannah Georgia Major Crimes Detective. He has seen many crime scenes like the one he saw last February. Little did he know this one would change his life. Grady, the newest addition to his team, is the first to see the abnormalities, but will the rest of the team listen in time. There is a serial murder on the loose in South Georgia, and for some reason the killer leaves their final victim alive right before committing suicide. But why? Masters and Grady must find out before its too late and the next killer strikes again.

SNIPPET:
Grady sat at the desk just behind Carmen’s and opened the file. A scary face with a scar from his forehead to his chin and ‘O77’ tattooed just below his breastbone stared at him. His vacant eyes were the eyes of a man bent on doing harm. Somehow it set him at ease that this man was no longer walking. Grady looked over to his Bio: Stephen Allan Tanner, 37, 5’10”, 275, Aggravated Assault with Deadly weapon 2009, Burglary 2009, Grand Theft Auto 2010, Georgia State Penitentiary 2010-2015, Assault Deadly Weapon 2016, Attempted Murder 2017.

“This guy didn’t know when to quit. Five years in GSP? Wonder how he got out, and why the other charges didn’t send him back?”

“That’s the penal system for ya,” Carmen said typing on her terminal.

“Then he went quiet the last few years. Dropped off the radar looks like.”

***That is this week’s ten. Dialogue always seems to make snippets so short, so here is little more so I can fill my need of leaving you on a cliffhanger. 🙂 ***

“Maybe the ‘O77’s’ told him to straighten up?”

“Or gave him a job to do.” said Grady.

“Like find college boys and rough them up?” suggested Carmen.

“What makes you say that? Are their similar cases to Mr. Nelson?”

“I researched cases that included injuries similar to Mr. Nelson’s. Doctors report he had cuts to both femoral veins well as his brachial veins. However, they were deep enough to cause bleeding, but not in the right place to cause him to bleed out. You have to lacerate an artery to do that. Tanner knew what he was doing. That made me wonder. Why would he not complete the job, and check out the way he did? So, I expanded my search to include any open cases regarding femoral and brachial injuries where the victim died.”

“And?”

Carmen plopped down four files on the desk in front of Grady.

“Four cases?”

“All open and unsolved. No forensics linking anything or anyone to any of them.” Carmen explained.

“Until today,” said Grady.

“Until today.”

A bit more information for you, with the promised cliffhanger. So, Nelson may not have been the first victim? Was it Tanner? Or could there be another predator on the loose? After all, Tanner’s victim survived. Tune in next week as Grady and the team put the pieces together and we find out more about these four other cases.

As for October, I may catch some slack from this but the reason I do not like the month is that I dislike Halloween. It’s all a bit too much for me. Call it my religion, or a boohumbug, but I think it’s more than that. It has gotten really ugly over the years. All the gore and evil surrounding it. It is far worse than when we grew up. Maybe I am just getting old. I mean, where is The Great Pumpkin?

I guess I just miss being a kid when life was simpler.

And speaking of being a kid…


Elissa Learns About Thankfulness
With Thanksgiving right around the corner, consider this charming story for your little reader. Book 4 in the Elissa the Curious Snail Series finds Elissa living with her human friend Francine. Elissa is sad because she cannot do some of the things her friends can do like fly or run. She eventually learns to be thankful for who she is and what she can do. Find out what that is when you cuddle up and read this book with your little one. It is available on Amazon at the link above.

Moments of the Heart is not just this website. I have a Facebook page that has something going on everyday of the week. Come on over, follow, and interact with my page to check it out! Here is what you can expect to find there.

Monday is Memory Monday – I share an important event that occurred on that Monday or sometime that particular week.
Tuesday is Talk About it Tuesday – I post a weekly video where I cover a topic that has meant something to me over the past week.
Wednesday is when I post my blog for the week.
Thursday is This or That Thursday – A weekly two option poll that raises the question, do you like this, or do you prefer that?
Friday is Fun Fact Friday – I find and share an interesting or obscure fact.
Saturday is for Weekend Writing Warriors – This is when I post my 8 Sentence Snippet from a current or past work.

I really am trying to make it fun and engaging. Something that people look forward to visiting. It has been something that has been on my heart (no pun intended) for a long time and I am now acting on it. I would love your support!!

Little Reminders of Who I Am is now available for purchase on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other booksellers.

–The Five Barred Gate is still available on Amazon in Hardback, Paperback, and Kindle versions.

–You can purchase TFBG direct from me on my Home Page. The benefit of buying direct is you will receive a personalized signed copy!!

–My Children’s books, Elissa the Curious Snail are also on Amazon. There are 4 books about an adorable snail teaching children about prayer and believing in themselves.

–Finally you can see all updates regarding the progress of this current Untitled work in progress.

Fellow Warriors, I also have have a weekly blog that is posted in between these snippets. I would love to hear your thoughts.

AND if you have little warriors running around I now have many of my Children’s Short Stories on this website. They were originally on my Elissa the Curious Snail publisher’s website, but I now control that domain and have moved that content here. There are many stories for your little reader. These are great bedtime or anytime short stories.

In His Exciting Service,

Jeff S. Bray


Little Reminders of Who I Am


The Five Barred Gate


Elissa the Curious Snail Series

Check out amazing established and emerging writers at Weekend Writing Warriors. Each week we post new snippets from either published works or works in progress for each other to comment on. Gain insight of how the mind of a writer works and a behind the scenes look at works before they hit book stands everywhere.


16 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors 8 – 10/4/2020 – Untitled WIP

  1. Interesting developments. Nothing like perhaps being able to clear some cold cases if they can solve this one too! Since this is a WIP, I’ll say I question whether a police detective would think a suspect’s face was ‘scary’? Hardened maybe or feral or…scary seemed not police-like. Sorry I can’t put it any better! Enjoyed the snippet and the procedural tone you’ve really got mastered here.

    1. Thank you so much for your input. I agree completely with what you are saying. A detective would not use such language. And this being a WIP I do welcome any feedback any Warrior brings to light. Yes, keeping it official sounding can be difficult without it sounding forced or trite.

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  2. Now it’s getting meaty!! I like old school Halloween, too. I’m a wuss when it comes to buckets of gore and squirm at even the tamest slasher movies. Too real for me.

    1. Yes, as I get older the more weird things become. My wife likes to dress up. She usually dresses up with our daughter, and they will match up. Year before last Audrey dressed up as Mal from Descendants. And Carolyn, she dressed up as Maleficent. They go all out. Last year Audrey was Mary Poppins and Carolyn was a chimney sweep… and yes, they did talk me into being a sweep as well. First time in many moons that I dressed up. LOL.

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  3. As someone else commented, the plot is thickening–and it’s doing it nicely. You have me wondering!

    One thing–unless I read it wrong, “…but not not in the right …” Repeated word?

  4. Re: The Great Pumpkin. Obviously you aren’t sincere enough to see him. Your larger point about Halloween is something I can empathize with, though I come at it from a different angle. After spending several years in the States as a child I moved here for good in my forties, and I was shocked at what Halloween had become. It’s so overwhelmingly commercialized and gaudy and, yes, gory.

    1. It becomes how can you top last year. Like I said before, just go from Sept 30 to Nov 1. I used to work retail and had to go through the worst of it setting up the aisles every year. Set up got earlier and earlier. Just as soon as you started to run out of Back to School stuff you were replacing it with Halloween items. — I am wondering and looking forward to seeing Effings take on Halloween.

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  5. I actually love October and Halloween. However, I live in a rural area. This is harvest time. Halloween involves a few kids in costumes knocking on folks’ doors. We give them Rice Krispies treats. I like to make decorations. I’m not religious. I believe that evil comes from human behavior. Which, in fairness, is worse in large cities. Since there are more people, there is more crime.
    I enjoyed the snippet. Nicely creepy.
    ~Cie from Naughty Netherworld Press and Readers Roost~

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I live in a rural area as well. Well, somewhat. I live in a small town. I leave my light on and hand out treats to all who come by. And I agree with you about evil coming from the individual. I just wish things weren’t so wrong in the world. Anywho. Thanks for reading. See you next week.

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  6. I’m with Grady on Tanner’s sentence. Georgia’s a mandatory minimum state so he definitely would’ve caught time for those newer charges. And generally, officers and the courts refer to charges they were sentenced to, not charges initially filed, so those charges would’ve probably been plead down from more serious ones (I used to work in the court system and many of my current clients have felony records/charges so I know a bit about all this).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Questions than need answers. 🙂 I have done quite a bit of research for this novel.Criminally and Medically. I just pray my ducks are in a row once I deliver the answers and that they meet the expectations to those who have experience like yourself.

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